I wanted to type this up before I forgot too much of it, but honestly, I think you're supposed to forget what labor feels like because otherwise, why would you bother to have more children? I'm just saying.
Since this is my birth story, I'm starting it the Saturday before I went into labor. DEAL WITH IT. (I wrote out this really long description of my Saturday before labor and then deleted it. It was a good day. Here's the TL;DR version.)
We finally got the carseat checked! I didn't think we would ever get that done, but we did and it was highly informative. After that, we went and did all kinds of "family of 2" things. We had brunch (AMAZING!) at The Social House in Fort Worth, checked out the chalk art festival on West 7th, and had a date night with Jennifer and Aulstin that night (Mexican food and games at the house! I loved it!). Sunday was pretty uneventful. Mike went to a baseball game and I honestly have no idea what I did. I probably napped.
That Monday morning, I went to the chiropractor for the first time the entire pregnancy. I have NO IDEA why I waited so long. My hips and sacrum were twisted like a corkscrew and I had three ribs out of place. No wonder I couldn't get comfortable anymore! Afterward, Grandmother and Granddaddy came to visit, see the house, and take me out to brunch. It was delicious and so good to see them. I took a nice nap until Mike got home and then we went swimming. The chiro told me to go on a walk because that would help my adjustment stick. Well, it was too hot to go walking, so we went swimming instead. I actually swam laps instead of just floating around, and did some lunges. Mike had a long conversation with Evelyn about how to break her water so labor could start and I haughtily informed him that hardly ANY labors start that way, so she probably wouldn't come like that. (Apparently she listens better than I was aware.)
After swimming, Mike made me his famous pan-fried chicken and rice. It was delicious. We followed the old "get the baby out the same way she got in" advice, but Evelyn didn't seem phased, so I just went to bed. Around 1 am, I got up to pee, went back to bed and tried to fall back asleep, but I was having this weird sensation like I was about to wet my pants. I laid there as long as I could, then suddenly I leaped up and as I did, there was a huge gush of water. I waddled my way into the bathroom, leaking everywhere. Sorry, that's gross, but it's true. I determined it definitely wasn't pee, so I waddled my way to the guest room where Mike was sleeping and started shouting "Mike!" until he woke up. "I think my water broke" is what I said, to which he replied "you think?" This irritated me because there was no other explanation for what was happening. At some point, I started crying because I "wasn't ready for Evelyn to come." Literally and figuratively.
The obvious solution was to go to walmart. So Mike and I got dressed and headed to Walmart to get supplies. We needed food for labor, depends since I was leaking everywhere, tennis balls (that we didn't even use), and underwear for post-baby life. My contractions started while we were at Walmart at about 2:30 am, so we called the birth center and our doula, Mica. No one answered, so we just started timing them. They were consistently at 40 seconds long, 2 minutes apart. Um...what happened to "contractions will start at about 10 minutes apart?" Nope, didn't happen for me.
We got home and I found that leaning over the bed and swaying my hips was the most comfortable position for me, so I did that for a long time. Carla - the one midwife we hadn't met yet at the birth center - called us back and said that she had just finished a birth! I was sure Carla was a nice lady, but I was really hoping she wouldn't deliver our baby just because I didn't know her at all. Is that terrible? I'm sorry. At some point we got ahold of Mica as well, which was good because I was super concerned at how fast and regular the contractions were coming. I really expected there to be more time between them and for things to slow down. Instead, they just kept getting more intense while lasting 40 seconds and happening 2 minutes apart.
Someone suggested I get in the shower and that was the best advice EVER. I could lean over on the seat in the shower and the water hit my lower back perfectly. I wanted to live in that shower. As I got out of the shower, Mike was doing his hair?!?! So I tried to do mine, but then Mica showed up so I gave up. We walked laps around the living room, sat on the yoga ball, and watched Pitch Perfect 2. (My eyes were closed the majority of the movie...I should probably watch it again) After Pitch Perfect 2, we decided it was time to go to the birth center. It was around 7:30 am.
After all the lectures I gave Evelyn about not coming during rush hour traffic, we still managed to get stuck in rush hour traffic on our way to the birth center. That was not fun, but I had my pillow and a heating pad so I survived. Mom pulled up at the same time we did, and I was excited to see that Lissa was the midwife on call. Lissa had done my last three appointments and I felt like we had a good connection.
Labor continued as was. Since my water broke and I have an anxiety disorder, I had asked for limited vaginal checks. But we went ahead and did one, and I was only dilated to a 4. I was super upset about this, but whatever. Lissa took me downstairs for an ultrasound because Evelyn was turned funny. I didn't realize this at the time and I was pretty convinced there was something wrong with Evelyn. Luckily (not really), she was just turned sideways. I guess she had all this room after my chiropractic adjustment and decided to twist around!
Next, we walked around the birth center, up and down the stairs, did lunges on the stairs, and I sat in the shower for a while. (FYI none of this is in any real order. I'm even looking at the birth notes and it's still foggy.) I was making very little progress and my back was killing me. Someone got me a TENS machine, which helped. Someone also got me a peanut ball, WHICH WAS PURE TORTURE. They look so cute and innocent, like a little peanut. Then you have to lay on one and it causes excruciating pain. This may have just been because Evelyn was fully sunny side up at this point and I guess the peanut ball was supposed to help turn her back around. It didn't. The notes say I was coping but I definitely didn't feel like coping. It HURT. Back labor is no joke.
We decided to call my chiropractor to come out to the birth center to see if she could get her turned around. She couldn't make it till after lunch. In my head, I thought this was okay because Evelyn would be here by then. HAHA. At some point dad showed up. I was completely miserable and I remember Mica saying something about transition. Well, I had listened very carefully in my birth boot camp class, and Hollie said that transition usually lasts 30 minutes. I was having a victory party in my head. The baby would be here soon! Unfortunately, no one told Evelyn this.
We checked dilation again, and I was only a 4. STILL. This was hours later. What happened to transition?! Again, I was devastated. The chiropractor showed up and went to work. Evelyn turned around! No more peanut ball? No, more peanut ball. More walking. More lunges. More shower time. I literally have no concept of time after the chiropractor left. It felt like I was in never-ending labor.
At 9 pm, someone took pity on me and offered me nitrous oxide. YES, I will take that. I passed out, but apparently I had a death grip on it and wouldn't let anyone take it away. I remember at one point I had to stop breathing in the gas because I felt like I was going to pass out but then mom was like "oh she's done" and I immediately grabbed the mask back and wouldn't let go.
Afterward, I vaguely remember someone saying I could lay on the peanut ball or I could get up and do lunges. I think they expected me to lay on the demon peanut ball, but I would rather die than look at a peanut ball again, so I did lunges and squats and walked around. Contractions were about 70 seconds long, still 2-3 minutes apart. At some point, I guess everyone was concerned that I wasn't going to ever have this baby. When your water breaks first, you're on a 24 hour time clock and we were getting pretty close to the at 24 hour time. They decided that if I wasn't pushing a baby out by 1:30, we'd have to transfer to the hospital. (all of this was told to me afterward, by the way. I probably would have driven myself to the hospital if someone had mentioned this to me, so I'm glad no one did)
I tried laboring in the tub and pushing, but I could not figure it out. We moved to the bed again around 11:45 and I was finally at a 10. FINALLY. (To go back a little - I told you this wasn't in order - I was dilated to a 7 at 6:30ish pm. It took me five hours to dilate those last 3 centimeters. That's horrific. Again, what happened to a 30 minute transition?
Finally I figured out this whole pushing thing. It's a lot harder than it sounds and I was doing it completely wrong for a while. I pushed for about 45 minutes and at 12:32 am, Little Miss Evelyn Grace Rausch was born. Probably one of the coolest things that happened was that Mike caught Evelyn! We had talked about him doing this, but left it up in the air. Lissa didn't give him a choice, however, and I think this was a special opportunity that not many dads get to have.
I thought I would cry when Evelyn was born, but I mostly look concerned in photos. I think being in labor for 22 hours will do that to you. Evelyn was born absolutely perfect - perhaps slightly coneheaded - and I remember being so amazed that Mike and I had created such a beautiful little girl.
At the birth center, babies born after the loss of another child get to put rainbow foot prints on the wall. I am so grateful to God for those beautiful footprints, his answered prayer to us.
"So I tell you; Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened." - Luke 11:9-10
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